Tag Archives: boundary

Your Relationship Needs to Change: Now What?

When someone says to you, “Our relationship needs to change,” what do you do next? There are a lot of right responses. However, there is only one response

Relationship Needs to Change, woman giving man shoulder rub, Brad W. Smith photographer,

When one person is always giving and the other is always receiving, the imbalance keeps the relationship from being a true partnership.

that is always wrong: “No, it doesn’t.” Unfortunately, that’s the response most of us give. Not out loud, but in our heads. We can feel threatened and full of fear when the other person asks for what he needs – a change. There is a better way to respond to that kind of statement than to set your mind to maintaining the status quo.

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Filed under Openness

Why Conflict is Good For You

If you’re like most people, you try to avoid conflict. You shouldn’t. Conflict is good for you because it provides the opportunity to tell someone about your

white man wearing t-shirt with quote, why conflict is good for you, Life is HOT blog, Brad W. Smith photographer

When a conflict arises, your first instinct may be to bury it inside, or to erupt in dramatic anger. Neither is good because you won’t have accomplished your real goal of changing the situation.

boundary and for that person to make a change. Conflict arises when how someone treats you or speaks to you crosses the boundaries of how you want others to treat you or speak to you. A conflict is simply the discovery and acknowledgement that the way the two of you relate to each other currently is not working.

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Putting Conditions on Unconditional Love

To decide to love someone unconditionally can be an easy choice to make, and it can be an impossibly hard commitment to keep. It’s easy when the other person

Putting Conditions on Unconditional Love, clown fish, blue sea anemone, Life is HOT blog, Brad W. Smith, photographer

No matter how much you love someone, no matter how closely you identify with that person, sometimes you must choose to maintain your boundaries and keep your distance.

is your sweet young child, or your cuddly pet. It’s hard when you cannot agree with many of the things the other person says or does. This is particularly true when the other person repeatedly violates your personal boundaries.

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Filed under Commitment