We all argue. There are two types of arguments, ones that are productive and ones that are destructive. You’ve probably experienced both kinds in your
Harmony is not a constant in relationships, nor is it required for good relationships. You can avoid destructive arguments when you stop resorting to verbal graffiti and simply ask for what you need.
life, but you may not have understood why some arguments have resolved a situation effectively, and some have left you frustrated and without a resolution. The key is productive arguing. When you know how to argue productively, your relationships are more likely to thrive than to die. You can avoid destructive arguing when you remember one simple rule: no Verbal Graffiti. Continue reading
I’ve spent the last few days immersed in family history, including the story of two brothers who split apart, became business competitors, and apparently did not speak to each other ever again.
We cannot change the future by reflecting on the past. History cannot change, but it does not have to repeat itself.
Talk about having an argument! Something tells me this was over more than who got the wishbone after Thanksgiving dinner.It is of course pure supposition on my part, but my guess is that they never resolved their conflict because they focused only on what had happened in the past, instead of how they could work together in the future.
It doesn’t matter whether the conflict is about something monumentally significant or infinitesimally small; a conflict is really about one person losing so the other can win. I have to be right. So that means you must be wrong. Continue reading