Category Archives: Respect

When Words Hurt More than Broken Bones

Whenever two people are engaged in a relationship where they care about each other or care about the same thing, it is inevitable that sooner or later, cross words will erupt.

black print on white

From the book, Coping With Bullying in Schools, by Brendan Byrne (1994)

From there, it’s a skip to harsh words and a jump to hurtful words, and before you know it, words have been said that aren’t really meant and can never be unsaid.

Horrible, hateful, mean words fueled not by the moment or the failings of the other person, but by our own past, reignited by the present. Words that lash the soul and break the heart.

We’ve all been there. Continue reading

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In Memorial, In Reconciliation

I heard someone the other day chide that, in case we forgot, this day is Memorial Day, it is not National Barbeque Day.

American flag, cenotaph marker, white picket fence, backlit by sun

We give thanks today for those who have served our country in the cause of freedom.

That’s true in the same way that Christmas is not Santa Claus Day and Easter is not about a bunny, Thanksgiving is not about Football, Independence Day is not about fireworks and Labor Day is not about marking the end of summer. Continue reading

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3 Phrases that Bring Comfort when Someone Dies

I’ve been to a lot of funerals and visitations in the past few years, not as one who has come to pay respects, but as part of the bereaved family. As such, I’ve been on the receiving end of a lot of statements of support. I’ve also watched some people struggle to know what to say.

A small private cemetery with American flag, tree, fence

Comforting words come from the heart to speak honestly about the death that has occurred and the feelings of the bereaved.

When it’s our turn to pay our respects at a visitation or funeral, we want our words to bring comfort. We want to be known as someone who understands.

Choosing the right words to say is a good first step. Knowing we have the right words gives us the courage to speak with compassion. When we pair those two things, our genuine concern for the person we’re speaking to shines through, and our words give comfort and we are remembered for it. Continue reading

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