Category Archives: Openness

Your Relationship Needs to Change: Now What?

When someone says to you, “Our relationship needs to change,” what do you do next? There are a lot of right responses. However, there is only one response

Relationship Needs to Change, woman giving man shoulder rub, Brad W. Smith photographer,

When one person is always giving and the other is always receiving, the imbalance keeps the relationship from being a true partnership.

that is always wrong: “No, it doesn’t.” Unfortunately, that’s the response most of us give. Not out loud, but in our heads. We can feel threatened and full of fear when the other person asks for what he needs – a change. There is a better way to respond to that kind of statement than to set your mind to maintaining the status quo.

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Here’s What I’m Thinking

“Here’s what I’m thinking,” is a phrase I use often in conversations at home, with friends, and at work. I’ve found that it opens the door to a discussion –

Here's What I'm Thinking Brad W. Smith, LifeisHOTBlog two young men, one white, one black, in discussion

When you take the time to engage others in conversation about your decisions, and share with them your rationale, you’re far more likely to gain acceptance, agreement and commitment.

especially when others seem to be reluctant to share an opinion, or to engage in the conversation, or they are not receptive to whatever action I just suggested.

It’s an effective technique at work, and you may already use it there.

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Your Beliefs Don’t Have to Define You

Your beliefs don’t have to define you, only if you let them. They express your understanding of the truth right now, and you have the choice to consider other

 Your Beliefs Don’t Have to Define You, LifeIsHOTBlog, Brad W. Smith photographer, photo text: “It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”

 

beliefs and opinions. You can choose to maintain your beliefs and to change your mind in the face of new information.

If, on the other hand, you equate your beliefs with the truth, then you’re more likely to feel anxious and frustrated with others who don’t share your convictions. Continue reading

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