At the beginning of the year I wrote about what it means to Live HOT by being Honest, Open and True. Chances are good you are already living each day by
these three elements even if you’ve never thought about it this way. If so, you’re enjoying the rich benefits that come with having a great relationship with yourself and with others, especially with those who are more important to you. I hope you find the Life is HOT blog helpful as you continue your journey, the same way that researching and writing about these topics has helped me.
But if you’re still feeling your way around, then I hope this post helps you understand why embracing life with honesty, openness and truth help you develop and maintain a good relationship with yourself and with others. Fundamentally, these elements are key to showing respect to yourself and to others.
“Positive feelings come from being honest about
yourself and accepting your personality, and
physical characteristics, warts and all; and, from
belonging to a family that accepts you without question.”
~ Willard H. Scott, Jr., American actor and weatherman
Being honest is about more than telling the truth. Being honest is about knowing your feelings and using that information as you interact with others. I’m not suggesting that you necessarily tell others what you are feeling. You know when it is appropriate to do that and when it isn’t. The benefit to being honest about your feelings is that when you know what you’re feeling, it’s so much easier to talk to people in a meaningful way that connects with them.
“You have to be open to everything.”
~ Ruud Gullit, European footballer
Your day is full of interactions with people who have had different experiences. They have different priorities. They’re simply different from you. Of course they’re going to see things from a different point of view and have opinions that are different from yours. That’s okay because most of what any of us think is not based on verifiable fact but on opinion or belief. You might be right, but you can resist the urge to convince them they’re wrong.
That’s right, you can be open to the views of others and still think that they are wrong. You are not obligated to agree with others, nor are you obligated to correct their thinking to align with your own. You can respect their right to their convictions while firmly holding on to your own.
For a few minutes, step outside yourself and look at the ideas or situation from their perspective, not from your own. The benefit to being open is that you show respect, and acceptance for others.
“This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”
~ Polonius, Hamlet, by William Shakespeare
In relationships, the concept of truth means to be true to you. Be true to your values and your boundaries and use both to guide your decisions and actions. Loving others starts with loving yourself and loving yourself requires that you be true to yourself.
The benefit to being true is that you choose to be who you really are, not who others want you to be, or need you to be, or have attempted to shape you to be. You do not need their acceptance, you do not have be their victim, you do not need to live their dreams for them. You are free to be who you are, nothing less.
Live Honest, Open and True
When you choose to live a life that is Honest, Open and True, you gain a better relationship with yourself. Only when you have a good relationship with yourself, can you have good relationships with others. By being honest with yourself, you can be honest with others. By being open to new ideas and the people who hold them, you learn to accept differences and to recognize that our experiences shape our point of view. By being true to yourself, you are free to be exactly who you are.
What makes your relationships work well? Have you noticed a correlation between those areas where you have a good relationship with yourself and those areas where you have a good relationship with others? Stop by our Life is HOT blog Facebook Group and leave a comment or tweet me @LifeIsHOTBlog with the hash tag #LifeIsHOT!