There are many parts to the idea of being true to yourself. One of them is about setting and keeping boundaries.
Another is about doing your best to tell the truth, as you understand it. A third part is how you interpret what others tell you or what they do. It is this last part that I want to address today.
Being true to yourself as it relates to information given to you by others means at its very core to consider what you hear and believe and evaluate it as whether it is an absolute truth, or opinion masquerading as truth.
Some things are unarguably true.
“The speed limit is 55,” she says, pointing to the sign.
Now, suppose there is no speed sign and she says, “You’re driving too fast.”
What do you tell yourself at that moment? Do you tell yourself she doesn’t trust your driving abilities? Do you question her gratitude that you’re bearing the burden of driving? Do you feel resentful, irritated?
How silly is that? You tell yourself a story you don’t like – that she doesn’t trust your driving abilities and she’s ungrateful – and then you get angry with her and with yourself.
Who told the story? Was it based on fact or opinion?
As silly as that is, you’re hardly the only one to do it. It’s a common occurrence, judging by the success of American speaker and author Byron Kathleen Mitchell, better known as Byron Katie.
Most of the time, the situation is far more complex than this simple example, but your thought process is the same. Someone says or does something, and you torture yourself with what you tell yourself about what it means.
We all get caught up in believing our own thoughts, especially the negative ones.
The word truth seems so simple and straight-forward. Most of the time, it’s anything but. Most of the time, truth is in the eye of the beholder. Most of the things we accept as true are a matter of opinion, often our own.
When you are true to yourself, you recognize things that hurt you do not belong in your life. The next time you’re chewing on negative thoughts, challenge the story you’ve told yourself and spit out those thoughts that are distasteful to you.
“Don’t believe every thing you think.”
~ Byron Katie
Life Is Honest, Open and True: The next time you start to feel agitated, irritated or resentful, ask yourself whether those feelings stem from something negative you’ve told yourself.
Would you share this post? Tweet: You tell yourself a story you don’t like, and the story makes you angry! A blog post by D’Anne Hotchkiss http://ctt.ec/5l9AV+
Thanks to my reader who suggested this story idea to me. If you have an idea you’d like me to address, tell me about it in the comments or tweet me @lifeishotblog with the hash tag #LifeIsHOT!
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