Words Cannot Express: What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Say

How many times have you heard someone say, or even read on a sympathy card, ‘words cannot express how I feel.’? Maybe you’ve said those words, or wanted to say

words: person, disease other words not in focus

When you’re searching for the words to express your feelings, look in your heart, not in your head.

them, when something terrible happened to someone in your life. You wanted to comfort your friend, neighbor or family member, and the right words did not spring to mind, and so you fell for the myth that the words don’t exist.

There are more than one million words in the English language. Be assured, the right words do exist. When you can’t find the right words, it’s not because they don’t exist, it’s because you’re looking in the wrong place. Loss, tragedy and grief are not about thinking. Loss, tragedy and grief are about feeling. The problem is that when you search for the words, you’re looking in your head when you should be looking in your heart. When you look within your heart, you find your feelings.

Here’s something for you to try the next time you’re struggling to find the words of comfort. First, take a step back for a moment and let your heart feel the situation. Feel what the loss means to you. Imagine yourself as the person you want to comfort. When you have done both of those things, you will have taken a big step towards finding words of comfort. For some additional help on finding the right words, read this heartfelt letter.

Life Is Honest, Open and True:  When a tragedy occurs to someone you know, it can be difficult to find words that comfort. Rather than focus on thinking about the right words, look to your heart and focus on your feelings. Then, the right words to express yourself will follow.

What do you do when you can’t find the words to express your feelings? Tell me about it in the comments or tweet me @lifeishotblog with the hash tag #LifeIsHOT!

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How to Show You Care When Someone Dies 

 

 

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  7. I just had to do this yesterday, and you are right, my first inclination was to fall back on that “I just can’t express…” Then I went, “wait a minute, you’re a writer for heavens sake!” I made myself find the words and was glad that I took the extra time. Good Advice!

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