We’re all part of team. Whether it’s a work team bound together by responsibility or the team called our family who are bound by blood and law, we’re on the team and we have an important role.
Every team member is valuable and important, but the truth is, there are seven players we do not need on our team. We do not need them because rather than being team players, they engage in self-serving behaviors. They don’t play with us, they play against us.
When we see someone being one of these players, we can be a leader by stepping up and serving the needs of our work team or family by putting our observations and concerns on the table.
The 7 Players We Do Not Need on Our Team
At Work: The person who criticizes and blames others for unsatisfactory results instead of focusing on the problem.
At Home: The family member who habitually finds fault with the meal, the housekeeping, or the personal habits or accomplishments of others.
At Work: The person who seeks attention by monopolizing the conversation or interrupting others.
At Home: The family member who brags about accomplishments, acquaintances, or vacations or any big-ticket purchases.
At Work: The person who tells jokes or clowns around in ways and at times that disrupt the work project or meeting.
At Home: The family member who derails serious talk between others by inappropriately making light of a situation or likening an important event or accomplishment to something frivolous.
At Work: The person who pushes a pet concern or agenda.
At Home: The family member who insists on a particular activity, destination or schedule.
At Work: The person who finds reasons why an idea will not work, without considering why it will work, or who refuses to agree to a compromise solution.
At Home: The family member who consistently objects to others’ ideas or negates every observation or comment.
At Work: The person who does unrelated work on the computer, engages in texting or side conversations, or otherwise does not engage in the purpose of the meeting.
At Home: The family member who is addicted to computer games or the TV, or withdraws to another room instead of doing chores, lending a helping hand or engaging with other family members.
The Weak Link
At Work: The person who shows up late or leaves a meeting early, or is unprepared, for instance, by not reading the meeting materials in advance.
At Home: The family member who forgets to bring the dessert for the big family gathering, doesn’t return tools or is perennially unavailable to lend a helping hand.
When we respect ourselves, we do not allow others to treat us disrespectfully. While we remember that we all have the occasional bad day, we do not overlook chronic bad actions. We do not dismiss their actions by telling ourselves the person does not know better, or that we do not deserve better.
It takes self-respect to speak honestly. When we turn the spotlight of honesty on another’s bad actions, we may not always receive the change in actions we request, but we will feel our respect for ourselves increase.
Life Is Honest, Open and True: When we are known to show respect to others and to ourselves, the Aggressor, Competitor, Joker, Lobbyist, Roadblock, Soloist and Weak Link are less likely to play roles in our lives at work or within our family. When they do show up, we can disarm them.