Do You Dwell on It or Do You Move On?

When a mistake happens at work or at home, do you dwell on it, or do you experience it, let go of it and move forward from it?

When we let something wash over us, we experience it and are changed by it, but we do not stay immersed in it.

It’s not always easy to let go of a bad experience, but we always have the freedom to choose whether we dwell on it, or move on from it.

A bad experience gives us the chance to learn from our own mistakes and the mistakes of others. It gives us reason to listen carefully in conversation about what went wrong and to listen carefully in conversation about how to handle similar situations differently in the future. If the mistake is ours, it gives us a chance to accept our short-coming, own up to it, and to practice humility. We tell ourselves how next time we will do differently and realize a better result. If the mistake is someone else’s, it gives us a chance to be kind and understanding.

Sometimes though, we become stuck, dwelling on a past mistake. We listen over and over to the hurtful conversation, we relive the wrong that was done to us, and we harbor resentment against the person who made the mistake. We cannot forgive others or ourselves.

We have the freedom to choose whether we harbor hatred or harbor healing. When we dwell on the past, we do not allow ourselves to heal from the hurt or allow ourselves to move forward. When we forgive another or forgive ourselves, it is we who feel the forgiveness because the anger and the pain are within us.

Moving forward is not always easy, but it begins with listening to new voices in our own heads. We have the freedom to replace the voice that retells the mistake over and over with a voice that tells us to forgive, and the freedom to forget by leaving the past in the past.

What’s past is prologue

 ~ William Shakespeare

Everything that has happened in our lives has brought us to and prepared us for this moment. As in a play, the past sets the stage for our next act. We have the freedom to choose how we act next. We can dwell on the past and let our mistakes and bad experiences pull us down lower and lower until we drown in them. Or, we can let our past experiences wash over us and change us, yet kept them behind us.

Life Is Honest, Open and True: You cannot dwell on a past hurt you’ve suffered or a mistake by another or by yourself and still be true to yourself. You can be true to you when you learn from the past and make changes for the future. You can be true to you when you resolve to let negatives flow on by. While you’re making your choice, watch and listen to the short water video.

Related Posts: Moving Forward  

The One Resolution You Must Keep

Are You Listening or Merely Hearing

The Truth Is, I Made a Mistake


Filed under Listening

15 Responses to Do You Dwell on It or Do You Move On?

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  14. These are great reminders. I tend to dwell, then have learned to let go. But, I still revisit. And this helps. The farther we get from a past hurt, a painful conversation, an unfortunate circumstance, the more perspective we can gather. This seems to work for me, the ebb and flow of reflecting and moving on.

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